Start of a Dream and changes

Years ago, before graduating High School, I had an idea: start my own comic studio. Inspired by various websites and companies/studios like Rooster Teeth, I had this whimsical thought that maybe someday I'll have a studio, with friends, making what I love, and people enjoying it. At the time, I "knew" this was fantasy. I've been one who starts things and never even gets them beyond planning faze.

But, as the years have passed, things have changed. I've changed. I'm terrified of change. Just now reading a friends blog about her own change scared the crap out of me, and has my heart racing. Yet, right now, I still don't know why. Change has, historically, usually been good for me. Changing faiths, changing ideas, changing styles, changing behaviors...they all have, in the long run, been good. But good gods are they scary. And when major changes happen to people around me, I freak. I suppose part of me thinks I'm going to change, too. But, it never really turns out that way. In a day or so, I'm fine, and soon, it's the norm.

So what does one have to do with the other? When this dream started, I had begun to loose every sort of crutch around me. It was scary. It was the Year of the Bawy. The next few years were years of creativity, of beginning....and, changing. I became a Shemsu, divined as a/the daughter of Heru-wer and Hethert-Sekhmet, beloved of Set, Ptah-Sokar-Wesir, Aset-Serqet, and Heru-sa-Aset. The next year, I discovered Wicca, and a few new faces. This past Kemetic year, I started college, discovered Hera and Her influence in my life, and friends. Friends who are like me. Artists, outsiders, people who, like me, have dealt with changes in some scary ways. We've begun building on one another, using each other to better ourselves. We've become a unit. And we've begun to start our own comic. We look at each others work, read, smile, and make it more than it was.

So, to this unit, I suggested the idea of our own studio. And we all like it. No "What?" or "Huh?" or "okay." It was "That sounds AWESOME!" Suddenly, that dream from years ago is so close to reality, it's breathtaking. But, it took years of change to come to. Nothings done in an instant. I suppose this entire blog is more a reminder to myself of that. One of my favorite vampires-Marius-once said that we never truly change, we just become more of who we're supposed to be. So may this be true here, too.

May this be the start of something great.